I love my job. There is nothing more powerful to me than helping someone take action to move forward in their life. And when I watch a client take control and and take their marriage to the next level? You can’t wipe the smile off my face for days!
I’m often asked why I got into coaching in the first place. The simple answer is that I love helping people.
The deeper answer is that I realized that one of the reasons so many marriages fail is that many of us never had a great model to follow. Even those of us that did (my own parents were very much in love and worked well together as a team) can still see their marriage fail (as my first one did after 16 years.)
When looking at my own experience I saw that even though I was committed to being married, I was not committed to being a great husband. I had a pretty good model, but I lacked the skills needed to keep it together. And it never occurred to me to ask for help, until it was too late.
Once I understood that I made it my mission to work with (primarily) husbands to give them the skills they need in their marriage, so that they can model a great marriage for their children. Additionally those parents can then be mentors who speak into their children’s marriages.
I’m here to help kickstart a cycle of strong marriages that carries on for generations. That is what gets me out of bed in the morning. That is what drives me to be fully present for my clients. That is, to put it simply, my God-given mission in this life.
As a coach I can work with anybody to help them get the results they want in life. And I specialize in working with Men who want a marriage that makes their friends jealous. As in, “I want a marriage like Ted has!” In general I prefer working with Christian Men as it gives me a leg up because I have God on my side.
Now comes the rant.
It absolutely drives me crazy when I meet strong Christian men who know that their marriage is not what it should be. But their solution is to pray for things to get better… and that’s it!
Now, I believe firmly in the power of prayer, and, yes, it is within God’s power to simply change your heart, and “fix everything” in your marriage. However, I’ve never seen that happen. Not “just like that.” Not without a lot of effort on our part. (Check out James 1:22 for one reason why.)
The Lord may open your eyes, and even give you the strength you need, but you have to do something. Sadly most men (and women) in this position don’t know what to do. If they did, they would have been doing it already. So they wait, begging the Lord to save their marriage while they sit idly by as it slowly continues to die.
Like I said, it drives me crazy. I have the tools and the knowledge they need, and they won’t take the step to work with me because “they have faith that God will answer their prayer.”
I’m reminded of the story of a man trapped on the roof of his house during a nasty flood. A rowboat comes by and calls the man to get in and be rescued. He responds, “It’s alright. God will save me.” The boat moves on and the waters continue to rise. Soon a motorboat comes by and, again, they call for the man to get in. Again he says, “It’s alright. God will save me.” Finally the water is up to his chest and a helicopter comes by with a rope ladder. They yell for the man to grab hold. The man waves and says once more, “It’s alright. God will save me.” Eventually he is overcome by the flood water and drowns. Once in Heaven he meets God and complains to him, “What happened? I had faith in You. Why didn’t you save me?” The Lord replies, “What are you talking about? I sent two boats and a helicopter for you!”
I don’t put a lot of stock in coincidences. If you are struggling in any way in your marriage and I (or someone like me) suddenly appears in your life, well, that’s what we call a clue. Or, you might even call it an answer to prayer.
I’m here to help.
I want the best for you and your marriage.
It’s why I’m here.
All you need to do is take action and ask.